Bluesorrhea

Symptoms: Disoriented lines, weak pentatonic tendencies

Treatment: Apply sound advice liberally to affected area

Doctor Recommends: Blue Grooves, Shred-Ahead Blues-Rock, Assembly Lines

Southern Groovatic Flu

Symptoms: Decayed rhythmic sensibilities, prone to train wrecks

Treatment: Get your groove on with accelerated rhythmic counseling

Doctor Recommends: Groove Camp, Rhythmic Grooves, Groove Builder

Acute Improvitis

Symptoms: Freezing up during solos, vacant thought patterns

Treatment: Ingest massive doses of improvisational grey matter

Doctor Recommends: Jazzed Blues, Blues Rock Evolution, Blues-Rock Secret Sauce

Chordalticulitis

Symptoms: Severely limited range of chord selection

Treatment: Frequent feedings of alternate voicings and inversions

Doctor Recommends: Chord Cookbook, Rhythmology

Post-Solophrenia

Symptoms: Fits of extreme paranoia and self-doubt after soloing

Treatment: Frequent meditation on insightful self-expression concepts

Doctor Recommends: Blues Architect, Solology, Vertical Soloing

Quasi Modalis

Symptoms: Any reference to “modes” triggers confusion and arrhythmia

Treatment: Achieve clarity and understanding through modal therapy

Doctor Recommends: Improv a La Mode, Total Modal

Picking Tunnel Syndrome

Symptoms: Monotonous repertoire and cramped technique

Treatment: Expose self regularly to fresh tunage and skills

Doctor Recommends: New School Fingerstyle, Roots, Rags and Blues, Fingerstyle Finesse

Chronic Manusfrigidus

Symptoms: Left and right hand techniques ineffective for no apparent reason

Treatment: Expand fretboard awareness with new shapes, forms and pattern

Doctor Recommends: Essential Techniques, Melodic Patterns, CAGED Dominant