Watch the Listen online guitar lesson by Rich Maloof from Guitar 201: Breakthroughs
Crazy, right? You have to be a listener in the audience while you're creating what's being listened to.
Where is your part? Fit in like a puzzle piece. Some things to have in mind:
Are you overpowering the vocalist?
Are you locking with the drummer?
Are you providing a rhythm part that supports a soloist? Are you playing the chords so he can hear them?
Are you crowding other players out?
Should you maybe not play anything for a little bit?